Screw Ritalin

I went to Avery's school today for a parent-teacher conference. They had a lot of really nice things to say to say about him like, he's bright, sweet, caring, intelligent, helpful...then they followed up with, "he has a problem controlling his anger" and "he doesn't seem able to control his impulses". I know all of this, so nothing comes as a surprise. They were urging me to speak to his pediatrician. I've never met his pediatrician, but plan on speaking to the dr about it when I take him next week. I think they were implying that I should talk to the ped. because they feel that I should medicate Avery. I will ABSOLUTELY NOT give him medication to control his behavior, especially considering he's not even 5 years old yet! How in the world does a child learn impulse control if you medicate him?

I have this idea that if you have mental issues of any kind, that it is mostly possible to learn to compensate with your brain and without medication. I feel that once medication is started that the brain overcompensates for the medication and ends up making the imbalance even worse. Its given that some people are better off with medication because it keeps them from slitting their wrists or killing people but I don't want to medicate my son so he can be part of the mainstream in school and behave like a little sheep. God, what might I be suppressing? Maybe he is like this because he is meant to do something with it when he gets older? Do I want to squash his spirit at the age of 4 and a half? Even though he might be a little challenging at times I LOVE him the way he is. I don't want to change his personality just so some teacher can manage him.

Good god.. I want an iced coffee something fierce.....I think I'm going to have to talk to my parents and see if they'll let me go AWOL for a few minutes before American Idol so I can get some. :)

No letter from Eddie today. Total disappointment but again expected due to the weekend mail break.